i went bed late in the night friday (actually, it was almost a quarter past one of the following day). i just ignored the buzzes of the timers and stayed laid down a little bit more (as the song sings: _if you’re lazy, stay in bed_, so i did it). more or less two hours later _that was close to 7 and something_ i finally got up and started the arrangements for the workout of the day. the peloton wasn’t an option anymore due to the time i left home (almost 9, and to make matters worse, they went through a totally different route yesterday, including a climb i’ve never done only because it’s a risky stuff: lotsa right turns and buses… you can figure out the rest). so change of plans: let’s go to the mountains again – almost a week after the hell of serramar, and because i couldn’t get on the bike during the week due to my moving _finally! yay! \o/_…
grajaú-jacarepaguá and abv were the chosen path. the final _dressing_ of the ride would be coming through américas and salvador allende then, instead of the most obvious route. anyway… at the very beginning of the first climb of the day, a dismay: a puncture. inner tube replaced and another problem: presta valve broken. oh crap… after that the mountain came then, and i defied her – once again. i know it’s an unfair game because i always lose, but i learn more about her every single time i go there. and not only about her but about myself as well. and now comes what would be the title of this post: suffering.
it’s a recurring topic _and feeling also_. why am i doing this? why am i causing this pain to myself? why am i inflicting this suffering to me? it’s hard to understand the big picture _and its details_ when you’re an outsider. for you, my sporadic visitor, lunatic might be the word. and i’m ok with that because it won’t be the first and unlikely the last time i will hear such a thing. yes, suffering is necessary to make you stronger. then you can:
– know yourself
– set some limits and boundaries _and even broaden them_,
– lead yourself to exhaustion so you can see the maximum load you can handle and be prepared when it happens again then.
i do like suffering in the mountains, despite how odd this may sound. the mountain makes me miserable and happy at the same time. breathing like a dead guy, legs burning like hell, the battle between you _your body, your mind_ and the road. and as any human that has faced pain and agony, i shout, i scream, i curse and so on. but then the top of the mountain is there and you can brag about this small (yet gigantic) victory.